The first week of the semester will soon come to a close as syllabi discussion is firmly wrapped up and the reality of learning is about to hit us all in the face.

We at the Herald have consulted the stars, not only in our galaxy but others as well, to see how your semester will turn out.

Aries — You’ll likely be the person in class who raises their hand first to answer questions from your professors. Your peers will think highly of you for this because it alleviates the stress from everyone else.

Advertisement

Cancer — It’s obvious that you’re having a difficult time already this semester, and it’s not due to your course load. No, no this difficulty reaches a higher emotional plateau from that tragic breakup you had over the summer. While romance may be fleeting, Cancer, you’ll find your GPA flees even faster.

Libra — My dearest Libra, why on Earth haven’t you ordered your textbooks yet? It’s one thing for them not to have arrived, but you haven’t even ordered them. Get it together, Libra.

Capricorn — The answer to your question is totally in the syllabus. Look there first before asking your professor that question.

Taurus — Your alarm has been going off four times in the last hour and I’m sure your roommate would love to stop hearing Smash Mouth’s “All Star” every time it attempts to wake you from your slumber.

Leo — That essay or test you’re already worrying about? Yeah, keep worrying about that actually. It definitely won’t be an easy task. Best of luck, Leo.

Scorpio — While you think you’re on top of going to your 8 a.m. class so far, it’s only going to get more tedious from here. Bonus points to you Scorpios out there who have already skipped out on those classes.

Aquarius — Prospects for new friendships look strong this semester, but what if they’re totally faking it though? Doesn’t that just keep you up at night? Find solace in your self-worth, Aquarius.

Gemini — Be careful when vaping inside of class. You don’t want everyone to know just how big of an edgelord you are.

Virgo — Stop putting off your laundry. It’s really starting to smell, but no one wants to confront you about that because it’s kind of awkward.

Sagittarius — Buy a horse and gallop to class from now on. Also, enroll your horse into your classes. Establish a long, rich friendship with the horse and work through the hurdles of the semester.

Pisces — Carry some water with you at all times to stay hydrated while going to class. One, because it’s very hot this time of the year. Two, you’re a fish and it’s required for you to live.